Sundays

I love Sundays. They have the potential to be the worst mornings of the entire week; tempting the most devout Christian to temporarily "lose his salvation" while he struggles to get self and many children ready for church, while seemingly everything that could possibly go wrong in a morning does. And for me it's even more challenging, because I'm pumping (many times actually on the way to church - ugh), and bottle-feeding, and measuring out and giving meds (unless Jared did them first) on top of everything else. Thankfully, Jared is a huuuge help...usually. (Love ya, Honey!) Sunday morning is, more often than not, a tremendous test of my patience and ability to maintain a good attitude... But then we get to church. Seems like, no matter how badly that morning may have gone, or how many times I lost my cool, or how frustrated I am with Jared or any number of my children, just walking through the doors of that building is soothing. My spirit knows what's coming and begins to respond immediately. Take a deep breath. Drop the kids off at their classes, greet friends, enjoy people oohing and aahing over Judah, find a seat. Take another deep breath. Let the music wash over me and the words of worship soothe, heal, and encourage me down to my soul. Music has become even more meaningful and powerful to me over the last couple months...well, since June 4th to be exact. Particularly the music we sing at church. God has used our director of corporate worship a lot in my life. I love his heart for worship and his commitment to make that worship deep, personal, and wholly focused on Christ. The music is so well done, without distraction or interruption. It's not just Rob's passion and talent that have touched me, though. More than that, it's the music that God has led him to choose. Ya, ya, ya I know it's not just for me...but I swear it could be. We sing a lot about God's glory. About His goodness and faithfulness. About His love and mercy. We sing about the amazing things He has done and does for us. About giving our lives over to Him, no matter what, to serve and praise and glorify Him. Rob wrote a song called "Hymn" - I love it. It's so beautiful and poignant. I should really ask him if I can put it down here. I guess, overall, the worship that I experience and actively take part in each week serves 2 main purposes right now: to point me back to Christ and inspire me to awe again and again; and to bring healing from the previous week or current circumstances, and rejuvenation for the next week and circumstances. Man, worship is so huge, and I feel like I just butchered what's been on my heart and floating around in my head for the last several weeks. Worship has become so intensely personal in these last months - I really don't know how to better express what I'm feeling...or how God is ministering to me. He is, though. I know it's not really Rob or any other part of the team. They're just the instruments, so to speak, but God Himself is the one ministering and healing. And hopefully being glorified by me in all my feeble, lame, inadequate attempts along the way.

The rest of Sunday is family time. I love the healing, peace, and comfort that that can bring, too. And when I say "peace" I use the term somewhat loosely. I do have 4 kids after all! Family time and our own routine is very special, and I look forward to it all week. It helps us get ready for another big week. Life with a Campus Life director and 4 kids, one with special needs, means that every week is a big week. So thankful for God's grace for each of those days within every big week.